Whenever I am in a public place, I like to watch how couples interact.  I watch for genuine affection,  attentiveness, conversation, touch, and respect.  There is a lot that can be learned about a relationship through observation.  One can quickly assess if a couple has had a good day together, a fair day,  a horrible day, or if there has been a  pattern of destruction for quite some time.

I’m sure their story did not start out this way.  That first attraction and spark, the smile that melted the heart or made it leap with joy, the long nightly phone calls, and the moments counted until you could see each other again.  There was the day you became engaged and excitedly told everyone how happy you were.  Finally, the wedding day came and all the blessings and wonder of the day and the hope for the future, and the promises that would be kept for a lifetime.  Sweet promises.

The happiness factor lasts for awhile, and you still hang on to every word that your spouse needs to express.   At some point in the journey of marriage, there may be an unexpected surprise when the light switch turns from “on” to “off”.   The light has faded into darkness.

The story has not ended, yet.  There is an opportunity to search for the candles and matches and find that one little flicker.  It’s faintly there… the love has not faded.  If you hold your breath, you can feel it inside.  A gentle loving hand gently squeezing the heart, trying to keep it alive.

This was my story.

There was a time when I believed the light had gone out.   However, there was a new love story that was about to begin.  The story of Christ’s love for me and his persistent gentle squeezes that kept my heart beating.  He wouldn’t let it fade into nothingness.  And out of what I thought was a lifeless dark place, he kept the light on ever so slightly.  That little tiny sliver of light is what kept me from ending my love story.

It is a lie that the Evil One feeds us that our love story has died.  He tries to cover that small sliver of light with his darkness.  However, I am proof that one little flicker can change into a love that has lasted for over thirty years.  And to think… I once thought it had died. 

My love story continues.

This has been a  soul-searching week that is only half over.  I have found that through the practice of learning and self-reflection that is part of the college program I am enrolled in — I have lived a very sheltered life when it comes to the depravity of the human soul.   Yesterday I observed the proceedings in a criminal courtroom.  I have been to traffic court and I’ve served on jury duty, but I have never been this up close and personal to the ways in which the mind and soul can be so tormented.

I came home, opened my bible for a few moments of refreshment, and this is the verse that leapt off the pages before me.

Matthew 5:21-22 (MSG)

“You’re familiar with the command to the ancients, ‘Do not murder.’ I’m telling you that anyone who is so much as angry with a brother or sister is guilty of murder. Carelessly call a brother ‘idiot!’ and you just might find yourself hauled into court. Thoughtlessly yell ’stupid!’ at a sister and you are on the brink of hellfire. The simple moral fact is that words kill.”

We may believe that murder is the death of another human being by our own hands, or the hands of another.  The person murdered no longer takes in a breath and walks the face of this earth.  However, based on what I read in Matthew yesterday, it doesn’t appear that God sees this as the only description for murder.

This got me thinking…

My husband is my brother, and I am his sister. 

I am perfectly capable of stabbing with the sharpest dagger… my tongue.

You may believe you are incapable of murder.  I challenge you to do a reassessment.